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Mother-of-the Quince

Mother of- the Quince

by Raquel Elekes from A Timeless Memory

For the last 4 years, I have watched and been introduced to harried mothers and daughters come to book video for their Quinceanera’s. The stress level has been at times even higher than that of a newly engaged couple planning their upcoming Wedding! I have listened and sometimes laughed at the stories of arguments over music, color choices, dance lessons and fiascos involving DJ’s, teenage boys and their natural shenanigans and large groups of girls giggling and not listening to a word they are being told. The eye rolling alone would make anyone looking from the outside in laugh hysterically!

Keep in mind the normal relationship between a mother and her teenage daughter is somewhat fragile at best. Add a Ball gown, dance lessons, a church ceremony, and a large sum of money and you have the potential to drive a sane mother straight into the closest mental health institution!!
As a Wedding Planner I understand the issues involved when trying to plan and make sure that all aspects come together in the end to create a seemingly perfect day. I have been involved with event planning in all aspects for the last 20 years. I don’t rattle easily. If you are planning a Quinceanera by yourself and for the first time it can very quickly become overwhelming. Don’t let it! Do one thing at a time and always write everything down. In the very beginning, sit down with your daughter and talk about what your plans are and ask her what she thinks. Have a list. Start with most important and end with what you would consider not quite so important. Listen to her input and keep in mind that she is the guest of honor.
If you have friends that have already planned their own daughters Quince, ask them what vendors they used, whether or not they liked them and why. Keep this information in mind when going through your list, but don’t use it as Gospel! There are a whole lot of vendors out there and it is always best to meet with them yourself before forming an opinion. My best advice is to call and make appointments. It may be time consuming, but you really do need to meet with the vendors in person. Prices vary for everything and I can tell you quite honestly that if you phone, ask for prices and make your decision based on that alone, you will be missing out on a whole lot of information. There is a standard list that we will all quote you if you call and say “what is the cost of your services?” or even “do you have packages and what is the cost?” If, however you make an appointment, you will find that vendors are a lot more flexible than the standard list. You will also be able to understand exactly what the cost is for and why it is priced the way it is. Sometimes you will find that you can mix and match packages depending on what you want and don’t want (I can customize just for your needs and I am confident that most others will too).
Once you have decided who to hire, make a follow up appointment and find out exactly what they are going to be responsible for. Write it down. Bring your list with you. If you have details that may be unique to your daughter’s Quince, and are unsure who will handle them, ask. Most Vendors have been doing this for so long that if they are not responsible for that particular detail, they will let you know the right person for the job. Organize your list and all of your notes. Make sure that you have everyone involved written down and their contact information. Create a schedule for payments, keeping in mind that all final payments must be made in full at least 10 days prior to your event. Make a calendar for meetings and keep in touch with your vendors throughout the planning process, it is VERY important to let them know of ANY changes or additions to your plans. Put together a timeline for your event. Sit down with your daughter and go through everything that will be happening on the day of her Quinceanera .Make sure you are both happy with the order of everything and what you feel will comfortable timing for each and every step of the evening. When you are both happy with it, meet with your venue, check to see if it works with their staff for a smooth dinner, show and dancing. Ask about any changes. If all is ok, then meet with your DJ or Band to go over the order of everything. It is REALLY important that you sit down with them and go through every step of the timeline so that they know what you would like to happen and when. Make any necessary changes. Notify your Venue if there are changes. If everything is set, meet with your photographer and videographer to give them a copy of the timeline as well. This way they will know exactly where they need to throughout the evening without you have to run around looking for them. Give copies to all your vendors. It is important for you to meet with everyone in person. Do not email your timeline! Hand deliver and go over it in person!!
One the day of the Quinceanera, enlist the help of a good friend to be the “go to” person. If they have your list of contacts, numbers and information along with your timeline, ask them if they will step in and help or hire a Planner for the ‘day of’, so that you can enjoy your day and evening with your daughter.
At the end of the day, the most important part of the planning process for your daughter’s Quinceanera is the celebration. You have both made it 15 years together and survived!! YAY! It is time to look forward to the next phase of her life and you are her guide. Talk to each other. Make sure that when she talks you listen. Lead by example and be available and try really hard to be patient, understanding and love her for the woman she is becoming. She did not get there alone. Celebrate!!

Quinceanera’sFor the last 4 years, I have watched and been introduced to harried mothers and daughters come to book video for their Quinceanera’s. The stress level has been at times even higher than that of a newly engaged couple planning their upcoming Wedding! I have listened and sometimes laughed at the stories of arguments over music, color choices, dance lessons and fiascos involving DJ’s, teenage boys and their natural shenanigans and large groups of girls giggling and not listening to a word they are being told. The eye rolling alone would make anyone looking from the outside in laugh hysterically!Keep in mind the normal relationship between a mother and her teenage daughter is somewhat fragile at best. Add a Ball gown, dance lessons, a church ceremony, and a large sum of money and you have the potential to drive a sane mother straight into the closest mental health institution!!As a Wedding Planner I understand the issues involved when trying to plan and make sure that all aspects come together in the end to create a seemingly perfect day. I have been involved with event planning in all aspects for the last 20 years. I don’t rattle easily. If you are planning a Quinceanera by yourself and for the first time it can very quickly become overwhelming. Don’t let it! Do one thing at a time and always write everything down. In the very beginning, sit down with your daughter and talk about what your plans are and ask her what she thinks. Have a list. Start with most important and end with what you would consider not quite so important. Listen to her input and keep in mind that she is the guest of honor.If you have friends that have already planned their own daughters Quince, ask them what vendors they used, whether or not they liked them and why.

Keep this information in mind when going through your list, but don’t use it as Gospel! There are a whole lot of vendors out there and it is always best to meet with them yourself before forming an opinion. My best advice is to call and make appointments. It may be time consuming, but you really do need to meet with the vendors in person. Prices vary for everything and I can tell you quite honestly that if you phone, ask for prices and make your decision based on that alone, you will be missing out on a whole lot of information. There is a standard list that we will all quote you if you call and say “what is the cost of your services?” or even “do you have packages and what is the cost?” If, however you make an appointment, you will find that vendors are a lot more flexible than the standard list. You will also be able to understand exactly what the cost is for and why it is priced the way it is. Sometimes you will find that you can mix and match packages depending on what you want and don’t want (I can customize just for your needs and I am confident that most others will too).Once you have decided who to hire, make a follow up appointment and find out exactly what they are going to be responsible for. Write it down. Bring your list with you. If you have details that may be unique to your daughter’s Quince, and are unsure who will handle them, ask. Most Vendors have been doing this for so long that if they are not responsible for that particular detail, they will let you know the right person for the job. Organize your list and all of your notes. Make sure that you have everyone involved written down and their contact information. Create a schedule for payments, keeping in mindthat all final payments must be made in full at least 10 days prior to your event. Make a calendar for meetings and keep in touch with your vendors throughout the planning process, it is VERY important to let them know of ANY changes or additions to your plans. Put together a timeline for your event. Sit down with your daughter and go through everything that will be happening on the day of her Quinceanera .Make sure you are both happy with the order of everything and what you feel will comfortable timing for each and every step of the evening. When you are both happy with it, meet with your venue, check to see if it works with their staff for a smooth dinner, show and dancing. Ask about any changes. If all is ok, then meet with your DJ or Band to go over the order of everything. It is REALLY important that you sit down with them and go through every step of the timeline so that they know what you would like to happen and when. Make any necessary changes.

Notify your Venue if there are changes. If everything is set, meet with your photographer and videographer to give them a copy of the timeline as well. This way they will know exactly where they need to throughout the evening without you have to run around looking for them. Give copies to all your vendors. It is important for you to meet with everyone in person. Do not email your timeline! Hand deliver and go over it in person!!One the day of the Quinceanera, enlist the help of a good friend to be the “go to” person. If they have your list of contacts, numbers and information along with your timeline, ask them if they will step in and help or hire a Planner for the ‘day of’, so that you can enjoy your day and evening with your daughter.At the end of the day, the most important part of the planning process for your daughter’s Quinceanera is the celebration. You have both made it 15 years together and survived!! YAY! It is time to look forward to the next phase of her life and you are her guide. Talk to each other. Make sure that when she talks you listen. Lead by example and be available and try really hard to be patient, understanding and love her for the woman she is becoming. She did not get there alone. Celebrate!

For more information please contact

Raquel Elekes

A Timeless Memory

956.489.9903

www.atimelessmemory.info